I am a Brony

Readers, I have something personal to admit. I'm... well, I'll just say it and get it over with.

I am a Brony.

Huh. That was a lot easier than I thought it would be.

Why are you looking at me that way? You're not going to make me explain it are you? No, stop, I can already see that you are. You heartless bastards.

Ok, there is this show meant for young girls-- That was a bad way to start. No, I don't own a white van.

Alright, there is a line of toys for kids (slightly better) called My Little Pony.

Well, its really more focused on kids of the feminine persuasion

Recently, Hasbro wanted to start up a TV show to help promote their newest line of the pink frosting dipped pony toys, and decided to release a show about them. This allowed kids to get their dose of cavity inducing visuals in multiple mediums- plus, it was a girl's show. The plot could be dumber than Home Alone and girls would watch it and love it. Product based shows are pretty much just infomercials with a better time slot (which is great) and less Billy Mays (which is even better, considering he'd need to be a zombie at this point), after all.

The project lead, Lauren Faust, had decided she had enough of stupid shows for girls however, and she was going to make her stand with My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic. And Hasbro said, "Fuck it. Go for it." The pilot aired, probably to the critical reception of the young kids it was aimed at. And all would have been well (and this post never written, and I would still have my masculinity) if it stopped there.

But it didn't. Instead, a Kathleen Ritcher had a retarded spasm. She posted an alarmist essay on the show, deciding that a kids show was where to take her stand against racism, sexism, and homophobia.

Because the shows audience deals with that on a daily basis, I guess? Shit, I thought life was tough enough for little girls considering that we get them kitchens for toys.  Oh, wait, I guess the sexism stuff makes sense now.

Anyone else see a distinct lack of sandwiches?

But, back to My Little Pony, because now something magical happens- Kathleen's essay ends up on 4chan.

If you don't know about 4chan, I hate you and your Internet innocence. This is the same unholy black abyss of a message board that created pedobear- an icon that represents pedophilia.  And that's tame for them.

To put it mildly, suicide is funny over there.

But for the sugar-coated ponies found their salvation, because 4chan started doing what it does and ripping Kathleen to shreds. And in this assault someone members actually go and watch the show.

And decree what they saw as good.

Yes, somehow, an overtly girly show (its main palette is saturated in enough pink to actually cause some people to go color-blind) found a home in the hearts of probably some of the worst the Internet has to offer. But, it gets even better.

Yes, Pinky Pie, the acid-cocaine-LSD party is only starting. (note: I can type that name without wanting to puke)

You see, most of that weird stuff you hear about on the web- those meme things- a lot of that starts in the black maw of 4chan.  It sorta spreads out and develops into an Internet subculture. 4chan isn't the only website that such a genesis happens, but it is the oldest one and probably still the most popular.

So, this insane, against all odds love of ponydom spread out among the web. And it multiplied- to the point where it got popular, several sites reporting 100,000 hits a day.

One of them happened to be a friend of mine. And I must have been really drunk or bored enough to actually break down and weep because I decided to check it out.  I won't lie, I almost didn't get through the first episode... but I did.

This is the villain of the first episode. Come on, you know you'd have to watch it to see how a bunch of frosting-sweet ponies take something this badass down

And then I saw the second episode. And the third. And then realized I would never, ever be a normal functioning member of society again or be able to use a masculine pronoun to refer to myself.

If you know anything about the web, then you know I am not the only male that weirdly, really gets into this show- as there are no girls on the Internet. Neigh (see what I did thar?) I am one of many. And we call ourselves Bronies. (portmanteau of bro and pony).

I'm serious- look at the stats for any of the episodes on youtube. You'll find that most of the viewers are males in the 12-35 range. And, judging from the comments, we don't really know why we like this show any more than you do.

But... I have a theory.  You see, the production values for the show are surprisingly high.  The team that put it all together gave more than just a casual passing fuck about how it would turn out.  But above all, the writing is fantastic. The show is straight up funny.  Not just the references that the shows target audience would never get (2001: A Space Odyssey gets a hat tip, for example) but the humor that had to be for everyone really is... for everyone.

I think the main draw to the show is the fact that the main cast (Twilight Sparkle, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Rarity and Fluttershy) are, in fact, fleshed out characters- especially for a children's cartoon. I see a lot of myself in these ponies, as they learn about friendship by struggling through trials. And trials they are- the cast treats the events around them like Serious Goddamn Business. So, maybe the issues the ponies deal with are ridiculous, but because they treat it so seriously, you can't help but be reminded of similar analogies in your own life.

It makes them believable, despite the stupid name, stupid coat color and the fact that its a goddamn anthropomorphic horse. They have personality, they get into fights, they generally act similar to actual humans- and as such, draw you in.

More believable than the entire cast of Deep Blue Sea

So, say what you want. But if you can get past the visuals and color choice and let the ponies be themselves, you'll find something magical. So, without shame, I admit:

I am a Brony. Haters be damned. Because MLPFIM is Rainbow Dash cool.

And because Fluttershy don't take no shit from no dragon.